I dnt know who im meant to be anymore. Im lost. I keep looking at other people and I see their passion and drive and I wonder what I am compared to them and who really cares. You see theres been times in my life where I know I could’ve and should have done it differently but I cant change them now but I wonder, if I could would i? if I could go back to that day nearly 3 years ago would everything have changed. Would I be better or would I just be sat somewhere else worrying about exactly the same thing. I used to think I was intelligent and I used to think that mattered, that it made me special, gifted even. Now I wonder if I ever was or whether I was just arrogant. And I wonder if I miss it. If I still believed I had a gift, if I made the effort to truly know rather than blag it would I feel better? But again, its that word effort. Without promise that itll help I am unmotivated to try because will I still feel lost but also tired.

“Help me believe, ‘cause I don’t want to miss any miracles!”